Did she, though? Reign in his narcissism? And did it develop all by itself? Or was a seed planted?
I don't know what his mother was like, and I briefly wondered about that once, long ago. I even considered writing directly to her to complain then, much like one would contact the customer service department and vent about a faulty product. Thankfully, I decided against it, partly because I had a feeling she wouldn't be on my side anyway
Now I read anecdotes from people who met her and I am surprised because she indeed seemed nice to fans. It was of course unfair to imagine her only in relation to her son, but I didn't know anything about her, and still don't, so, based on what her son was like, I pictured a rather horrid woman, who had encouraged her son to do anything to become famous and wealthy and who wouldn't care at what cost, as long as she got money and that weird "respect" her son now mentions, (the respect that is, what, due to her because she gave birth to him? How ridiculous is that? How reactionary is that? )
If people she's never met or heard of send beautiful flowers, ultimately, it's a mark of "respect " to him, it's attention that HE receives. I imagine whenever some old Mafioso's mummy dies, the local people fight over who sends the biggest wreath, because they need protection or whatever. So I assume if you send a bouquet from Peru you're in desperate need of Sammy's blessings because the harvest has been bad. Something like that.
Sure, sending "expensive" flowers ("I saw you get those daisies from the neighbour's lawn! Congratulations! You're barred!") is a nice gesture, but no matter how sincere these people were, they can't forget that his mother is never going to see those.
So yes, this all robs her of her own death a bit, I agree. It makes it all about him. Again. And yet surely she was her own person, not just somebody's mother, not just the matrix.
It would have been nice to learn more about your mum, Morrissey. What was her favourite flower? Could she sing any Irish ballads? Did she have a favourite subject at school? Was she creative? Did she sometimes think the men in her family were twits? Was she member of "for Britain"? The Flat Earth Society? The RSPCA? Any favourite crisps flavour? Did she recognize fans' handwritings on envelopes? Who was her favourite Morrissey musician? What kind of upbringing did she have? Was she a buddhist? Did she ever knit you a jumper?
You ask people to pray for a stranger. Your faithful nephew takes it even further and welcomes everybody to a service nobody outside Ireland can go to anyway to celebrate the life of a stranger. You choose to make all this public when you could take this time to stop, to take stock.
So I've heard many times that people grieve differently but I don't see the respect. Unless her final wish was to have the funeral of a rockstar and be part of the usual Centrassholery.
I 'm sure there is love for her, you keep saying you loved her, and I'm sure you're heartbroken, you must be. But as always, no matter how much you claim to love someone, they come second.
That's fair enough. And it's no surprise.
I truly hope you'll find your way out of that before your death though.
One last thing about respect. People are worthy of respect until proven otherwise. For instance, me, in the House of Morrissey, if I want to disrespect Steven Patrick Francis and the self-important halfwit who tells the world to say a "Snail Mary' for his grandma, in Spanish, something is telling me it's A-ok.
You show the respect or lack of you feel. It's all ok to me. Morrissey hasn't stopped being Morrissey just because his mother died. Sadly.
Now or in a little while would be a good time to do just that, though.
There is help and support if he chooses to explore that option, which might actually be the only one. I'm sure Russell could help, people like that.
All he can see now is he's denied going on stage but it might be a reflex to avoid facing his grief. In a little while he might see things differently. Maybe feel like breaking the family.
(Yeah that means telling the nephew to stfu.)(in plain english)(You know, the language absent from that 2nd paragraph?...)
And that doesn't mean the end of the song, just the end of the circus, the yt videos, the loopy rants, etc.
A bit like being born again.
I know. Too soon. Just planting. We'll see.
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