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[[File:Headmasterritual1985.jpg | thumb | right | Cover art (UK CD)]] [[File:Headmasterritual.jpg | thumb | right | Dutch cover art]] {{Discobox | Name = The Headmaster Ritual | Total Length = 4:52 | Recorded = October 1984 | Writer = [[Writer::Morrissey]] / [[Writer::Johnny Marr]] | Producer = [[Producer::The Smiths]]<br>[[Stephen Street]] (Recording Engineer) | Mastered = | Art = Cover star: [[Mention::Viv Nicholson]] (UK CD)<br>Dutch cover: Robert Duncan from [[Mention::The Uncle]] (1965) designed by Morrissey<br>Layout: [[Mention::Caryn Gough]] | Vinyl Etching = No matrix message | Publisher = [[Megadisc]] (Netherlands)<br>[[Rough Trade Records]] (UK)<br>[[Sire Records]] (US) | Format = 7" Vinyl, 12" Vinyl, CD | Release = February 1985 (Album version)<br>Summer 1985 (Holland - exact date unknown)<br>December 1988 (UK CD)<br>2009 (Reissue) | Chart = Not applicable (UK release 1988) | Type = Single | ArtistType = The Smiths | Previous = Barbarism Begins At Home | PreviousLink = Barbarism Begins At Home (single) | Next = That Joke Isn't Funny Anymore | NextLink = That Joke Isn't Funny Anymore (single) }} [[Category:The Smiths Lyrics]] ==Information== Excerpt from [[Mention::Peepholism: Into The Art Of Morrissey]]: <blockquote> The sleeve photograph is a still taken from an obscure 1960's film called 'The Uncle'. The single was originally released in Holland only, as an alternative to 'That Joke Isn't Funny Anymore', with the same four live B-sides on the 12". The sleeve was originally intended to be a still of Sir [[Mention::Laurence Olivier]] with cane raised over [[Mention::Terence Stamp]]'s hand from the film ''Term of Trial'', but although Terence Stamp gave his consent. Olivier was not forthcoming - at least, not in time for release. Such a gripping illustration would doubtless have got up the the noses of, e g. the ''Manchester Evening News'' even more than the lyrics alone did when the song first came out on ''Meat Is Murder''... with enraged protestations of the Greater Manchester Education Committee, talk of picketing the concerts, etc. </blockquote> <gallery> File:Peepholism - The Headmaster Ritual.jpg | "The Headmaster Ritual" - Peepholism entry File:Term Of Trial - Laurence Olivier and Terence Stamp.jpg | Laurence Olivier and Terence Stamp in "Term Of Trial" </gallery> ==Track list== ===7" Vinyl=== Netherlands - [Megadisc β MD 5290] {{tracklist | 01 = The Headmaster Ritual | 01link = The Headmaster Ritual (single) | 01-duration = 4:52 (Morrissey/Marr) | 02 = Oscillate Wildly | 02link = Oscillate Wildly | 02-duration = 2:32 (Morrissey/Marr) }} ===12" Vinyl=== Netherlands - [Megadisc β MD 125295] {{tracklist | 01 = The Headmaster Ritual | 01link = The Headmaster Ritual (single) | 01-duration = 4:52 (Morrissey/Marr) | 02 = Nowhere Fast | 02link = Nowhere Fast | 02app = (live in Oxford) | 02-duration = 2:31 (Morrissey/Marr) | 03 = Stretch Out And Wait | 03link = Stretch Out And Wait | 03app = (live in Oxford) | 03-duration = 2:49 (Morrissey/Marr) | 04 = Shakespeare's Sister | 04link = Shakespeare's Sister (single) | 04app = (live in Oxford) | 04-duration = 2:12 (Morrissey/Marr) | 05 = Meat Is Murder | 05link = Meat Is Murder (song) | 05app = (live in Oxford) | 05-duration = 5:34 (Morrissey/Marr) }} ===CD=== UK - [Rough Trade β RTT 215CD] {{tracklist | 01 = The Headmaster Ritual | 01link = The Headmaster Ritual (single) | 01-duration = 4:52 (Morrissey/Marr) | 02 = Nowhere Fast | 02link = Nowhere Fast | 02app = (live in Oxford) | 02-duration = 2:31 (Morrissey/Marr) | 03 = Stretch Out And Wait | 03link = Stretch Out And Wait | 03app = (live in Oxford) | 03-duration = 2:49 (Morrissey/Marr) | 04 = Meat Is Murder | 04link = Meat Is Murder (song) | 04app = (live in Oxford) | 04-duration = 5:34 (Morrissey/Marr) }} == Lyrics == <poem> Belligerent ghouls run Manchester schools spineless swines cemented minds Sir leads the troops jealous of youth same old suit since 1962 he does the military two-step down the nape of my neck I wanna go home I don't want to stay give up education as a bad mistake mid-week on the playing fields Sir thwacks you on the knees knees you in the groin elbow in the face bruises bigger than dinner plates I wanna go home I don't wanna stay Belligerent ghouls run Manchester schools spineless bastards all Sir leads the troops jealous of youth same old jokes since 1902 he does the military two-step down the nape of my neck I wanna go home I don't want to stay give up life as a bad mistake please excuse me from gym I've got this terrible cold coming on he grabs and devours he kicks me in the showers kicks me in the showers and he grabs and devours I want to go home I don't want to stay </poem> {{CommonSongSections | Artist = The Smiths | Song = {{#replace:{{#replace:{{PAGENAME}}| (single)|}}| (song)|}}}}
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